I haven't posted a journal in a while. Sorry to anyone that had been tracking my journey with my daily journals, but I've just had some much going on outside of the cycle my brain feels fried currently and emotions have been all over the place.
What a day. First, a huge Happy 30th Anniversary to my parents. I can only pray that my own relationship lasts and flourishes the way theirs has.
Today was also my 40th birthday, though it certainly didn't start out as a celebration. I began the morning at the courthouse filing paperwork on a personal matter—something that has had my anxiety running through the roof since last Thursday. After finishing up, Lauren suggested grabbing a birthday coffee. It was the first coffee I’ve ordered out since August, and while it was incredibly sweet, it was a great idea and gave me a genuine moment of joy. I’m also so deeply grateful for all the birthday wishes from the wonderful people in my life. I am truly blessed to be surrounded by such great individuals every day.
When I arrived at work, I jumped right into a mentee session with Master Jenn to work through staff forms. While working on #2—specifically the turning hook kick—my left hamstring popped loud enough for Master Jenn to hear it. I managed to lower myself to the ground as safely as possible without collapsing. An instant sweat came over me along with a burning sensation in my leg.
This is the exact same leg I injured when I first returned to Taekwondo a year ago. Back then, the pain was a solid 9 out of 10. Today felt closer to a 7, so I’m holding onto hope that this is a good sign and won't keep me from testing. Tonight, I'm sticking to a strict recovery routine: alternating ice and compression wrapping every 30 minutes, followed by elevated leg compression therapy.
Looking back across 40 birthdays, this easily ranks in the bottom three. The only worse ones were three years ago due to severe work stress, and two years ago when about 15 of us—including my wife's family—were trapped in the mountains with no power or running water during Hurricane Helene.
I hope everyone else had a smoother start to the final week of our cycle. If you're reading this and pray, I could certainly use a few tonight.